


Only You

by Amberly



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: 2x3, Kink, M/M, gundam wing - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-07
Updated: 2013-04-15
Packaged: 2017-12-07 05:31:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 30
Words: 14,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/744833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amberly/pseuds/Amberly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A serious of 30 drabbles. Basically, my goal is to show the development and dynamic of the 2x3 relationship, through a series of interconnected drabbles, each between 100-500 words, focusing on showcasing my personal headcannon.</p><p>I’ve kind of been calling this the “fic I didn’t mean to write.” It started off as an excerise and then got away from me—way, way away. It does form a fic, with a sort of plot, although a lot of the plottier bits are merely alluded too, as I focused mainly on the relationship between Duo and Trowa, and their reactions to what was going on around them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Flame

**Notes:** Not beta’d! 

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:**

I want to take this time to point out that, since these are based on prompts, they are not in chronological order. Once the drabble challenge is over, I will reorder them, so that they can be read in a more chronological format.

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

“That's close enough,” the voice was soft, close, the accent clinging to the vowels. Duo stiffened, shivering, then pushed the hood of his coat back. He hated this place. It was freezing, the ground hard beneath his booths, and this person was a stranger, even if they were on the same side. He shivered again, hard, glaring at the boy.

“Shut up. It's me,” Duo growled. He wanted to go inside. Trowa surveyed him silently, then nodded. Turning abruptly, he lead the braided pilot in to the squat cabin. He was quieter this time, Trowa noted, with less movement. Shutting the door, he pointed to the fireplace.

“Go get warm,” Trowa ordered, tugging the heavy coat off of Duo's outstretched arms.

“Fuck you,” Duo growled, arms wrapping tight around himself.

“Buy be dinner and we'll talk,” Trowa shot back, hanging Duo's coat next to his own. Duo laughed, hard, suddenly doubling over in front of the fireplace, braid sweeping the ground. He grinned, and Trowa grinned back, and Duo felt warmed by the humor, even as Trowa's face fell back in to the blank mask. They were the jester and the silence clown, laughing together. He jumped at the light touch to his arm.

“Status?” his voice was like snow, Duo thought. That same silence. Duo liked the cracks in the mask better. He shrugged off the touch.

“I'm fine,” he yawned, sinking to the floor. The rug in front of the fire was thick and soft, and he curled on it happily, smiling as he warmed. Trowa's lips quirked. He was a loudmouth, and over-energetic, but endearing, Trowa thought, sinking down next to him. Duo let Trowa curve around him, acknowledging the wisdom of shared heat and warm bodies.

“You try anything and I'll gut you,” he warned as Trowa's arm wrapped around him. The Russian chuckled.

“Shut up. You're too scrawny,” Trowa grinned, resting his chin on top of Duo's head. Duo grinned as well, eyelids fluttering shut, bathed in orange from the flames of the fire.

Duo woke the next morning with his face against Trowa's chest, arms around his neck. He could feel Trowa's chest rise against the fall of his own, legs tangled. The fire was mostly out, smoldering, and Duo shivered, pressing closer. Trowa's arms tightened around him reflexively, then loosened. Trowa woke slowly, unsurprised by the thin, scrawny body wound around his own.

“You should eat more,” Trowa noted.

“You should shut your goddamn mouth,” Duo growled. They looked at each other and grinned, Trowa's hand warm on Duo's back.

“You're a brat,” Trowa sat, yawning, laughing as Duo curled, whining pathetically. Duo reached, tugging at him.

“Asshole. I was warm,” Duo kept his voice strategically petulant, and Trowa laughed again, drawing him in to his lap and poking at the fire with an iron.

“Brat,” he grins, fire flickering, slowly seeping to life.  


	2. Knowledge

**Notes:** Thank you to Mako for bein' a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Use of Pot! Also! "mi yehrhore" means "my brother." "patyet" means "pack."

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Trowa shrieked as Duo pounced on him from the second floor landing, shouting and knocking him to the ground. He cursed, grappling with 90 pounds of over-eager Shinigami, growling as Duo laughed, pinning one of his hands and tickling his sides.

“I am the dread pirate Shinigami! There will be no survivors!” Duo crowed, and Trowa laughed wildly. He was ticklish, and Duo's fingers hit just the right spots. They'd been a the safehouse for a week, with no words from the others and no new orders, and Duo'd been climbing the walls. Trowa laughed and bucked and finally flipped them, making a smug triumphant noise and tickling the braided boy mercilessly. He grinned, watching as Duo writhed and giggled, head tossed back, cheeks flushed. Trowa stood, helping Duo up, then crouched.

“One,” he counted, playful, conscious of excess energy and the need to be boys, for once, and not soldiers. Duo laughed, then took off, and they spent the afternoon chasing each other through the house, shouting and laughing and collapsing, finally, on the sofa, chests heaving, cheeks flushed. Trowa nudged Duo with his shoulder, and grinned when Duo nudged back, eyes bright with laughter.

“Feel better, brat?” Trowa panted, and Duo nodded and grinned. He wondered how long it'd been since Duo'd been able to play, to run and jump and worry about nothing. Trowa stood, grinning and leaving the room.

When he came back, Duo was waiting, head cocked to the side. Trowa slid the blunt between his fingers and winked.

“I'm corrupting you. It's an older brother's responsibility,” he teased. Trowa would never forget the expression on Duo's face, the way he'd looked terrified and hopeful and shell-shocked, all at once, blunt paused at his lips. He inhaled, slowly, eyes glued to Trowa, then exhaled, blowing smoke and handing the blunt back to Trowa.

“I'm a big responsibility, Tro. I make a lot of messes...not housebroken...I have a tendency to run my mouth...I don't listen well, either, and I always get people killed,” Duo said it like confession, and Trowa cocked his head and shrugged.

“If I can take care of a lion, you should be a piece of cake,” he took his own hit, pleased at the slow creep of mischief over Duo's face. Duo shook his head and deftly stole the blunt from Trowa's lips, leaving him blinking and staring.

“If you say so, mi yehrhore,” he grinned, inhaling as Trowa feigned outrage, reaching for the blunt.

“Thief!” he accused, then laughed, Duo's deadpan face warming him. He felt less alone, felt like a family, for once, and they sat and smoked until dark, laughing together.  


	3. Thanks

****Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](tinadoodle.tumblr.com) for bein’ a beta!  **

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Mentions bedwetting! 

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Duo yelled in to the blanket, huddling at the back of the linen closet. He curled his knees closer to his face and yelled again, screams muffled by the fabric. Trowa knew, now, the bitter, acrid scent of urine unmistakable in the small room, even with the bed stripped and Duo showered. It clung to the mattress, and Duo his and screamed in frustration and loss.

Even after everything Trowa had seen, this was the worst. The nightmares and screaming, violent retching, the time Trowa had pinned him after walking in on Duo holding a knife. None of it compared. This was more than the awkwardness of sharing a bed and waking up after a wet dream. This was shame, and Duo felt the white hot heat of it flaying his skin and rattling his bones.

This was weakness visible.

15 year old boys did not wet the bed.

No matter how bad the nightmares got, no matter how afraid they were, and Duo was conscious of his status of less than. He shuddered in the closet, bare skin prickling.

They were in the middle of the war, even if it was quiet, and he and Trowa were the only two in the safehouse. Duo stayed because he had nowhere else to go. Trowa stayed because he could, Duo thought. Trowa did what he wanted.

Duo was grateful it had only been Trowa. He'd woken screaming, covered in piss, smelling rotted flesh and the stench of electricity. He'd shuddered violently, stripping the sheets and showering without thinking of the fact that his room was shared. It wasn't until after the shower that he realized Trowa had been there, awake and watching.

He pulled the blanket around himself, eyes stinging. There were towels between himself and the door, and he curled tightly in his cocoon, clinging to the blanket. No one wanted to be friends with someone who wet the bed, and Duo felt the loss of family keenly. He fell asleep tucked in the back of the linen closet, curled and whimpering, eyes wet.

It took Trowa three hours to find him. He'd checked the outside of the house, first, for any sign of someone leaving. Then he tore the house apart, gnawing his lip and counting the silverware until finally, slumped against the linen closet door, he heard whimpering, the soft sounds of distress he associated with Duo and sleep. He opened the door just as the screaming started, pulling Duo on to his lap and holding him tightly, even as he struggled.

“Be still, brat. I've got you,” Trowa brushed his lips over the top of Duo's head and he stilled. Duo swallowed, then clung, saying thanks in silence. 


	4. Winter

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Allusion to NCS with someone of the age of 13.

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

It was freezing. Trowa huddled down beneath his blanket, fighting not to shiver, or whimper, or give away the fact that he was cold, on the edge of the huddle and no warmer than he would be if he were alone. Attracting attention was dangerous, and he curled, trying to press tighter against one of the warmer, bigger bodies next to him. He wanted to blend in, to be unseen, and at night it was harder to stay quiet and out of the way, here in a place where “out of the way” meant dead, frozen in his sleep.

They were coming. Trowa could hear the steady sound of boots in snow and he cringed and shut his eyes and clung. He didn't know which of the other younger ones he was next to, but he knew that, already he was on the edge. He'd moved too slow, after dinner, and had a spot too far from the fire and protection of other sleeping bodies. He shivered, violently, then let out a whimper as a pair of soft hands raised him, stroking back his hair.

“Little nameless mouse,” the voice mocked, low and young and Russian. Trowa drew back, shivering, and the man held his arm, shushing him. He struggled, pulling and biting his lip. Too much noise meant waking the bosses and that wasn't smart. That could get you killed. But he knew what happened to the kids that got dragged in to the tents of the older men, and he didn't know if that wasn't worse.

“Little mouse, are you cold?” The voice was seductive, and Trowa could hear the promise of warmth. He shook his head and tugged at the hand on his wrist, and the man laughed, yanking him forward and throwing him over his shoulder. Trowa fought, wiggling and trying but he was only 13 and the man who held him captive had twice that many years. Maybe even three times as many, and Trowa fought and whimpered and finally gave in, because it was warm. And then it hurt, and he screamed in to the hand over his mouth and tried to get away and—

His cheek burned. Trowa placed his fingers to it and stared at Duo, who had him by the shoulders, face white and worried.

“You were screaming,” Duo whispered, and Trowa was aware of the sound of others in the safehouse, could feel the ebb of Quatre in the distance, maybe on the stairs, and he shivered, violently. Quatre would have questions, would want to soothe with those hands and that voice and Trowa wanted to throw up because how could he look at Quatre, after?

“Lock the door? Please?” Trowa begged, voice stilted and choppy, and Duo darted up, locked the door, and then came back to wrap his arms around Trowa, to pull him tight to his chest and let him cling.


	5. Move

**Notes:** Thank you to Mako for bein' a beta!  

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

 **This Part Specific:** None! 

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

They never slept in the same warehouse for longer than a week. Duo held Solo's hand as they moved, hair a wild tangle down the back of his shirt. Solo told him how pretty it was every day, and Duo was proud of himself for something he couldn't control.

He was the youngest, then, and Solo took care of him. Solo, who called him “kid” or “kitten,” and brushed his hair out once a week, when he could steal a brush. Solo's hair was short, a messy blond mop, and Duo liked to stick his fingers in the curls, or tug them like springs.

But a week took all of Duo's fingers to count, and he was only on the first hand. The pack was running, Solo tugging on his hand. It was hot, hard to breath, and Duo's eyes stung. One of the other kittens wasn't moving, and Duo whimpered. The pack was supposed to stay together. No one was supposed to get left behind. He tugged back, and pointed, and Solo turned, picking him up and tucking him in to the curve of his body.

“Shhh, I know, mi yehrhore.” Solo whispered in to Duo's hair. “But we run, now. The warehouse is on fire.” Duo didn't know what a fire was, but he knew it was getting hotter, the air thicker and that Solo was brother, was patyet, and they ran, flames licking the walls. Until Solo tripped and Duo screamed, and they weren't far enough. Duo screamed and writhed and watched as Solo burned, dying with Duo's name on his lips.

“Duo!” Trowa was shaking him, hands tight on his shoulders, and Duo swung without thinking. Trowa's hand grabbed his fist, other hand clapping over Duo's mouth as he cursed in Russian. They had to be quiet; the house was supposed to be empty. Duo's screams could wake the dead.

He panted, starring wide eyed at Trowa, then reached out, clinging to the only body he'd called brother since Solo'd died in the plague. Trowa help him, eyes just as wide, two lost boys in a war they couldn't walk away from. Duo babbled against his chest, words thick and fast and in a language Trow didn't recognize.

“Something I can understand, brat,” Trowa breathed against his hair. Duo was trembling, shaking and clutching hard at Trowa's arms, face against his bare chest. He swallowed, shaking his head, prayer finished. Solo was dead, but remembered, and Duo calmed as Trowa sang softly in Russian. Duo pulled away, eyes red-rimmed and glassy.

“We have a mission tomorrow,” he murmured, lying down.

“So sleep,” Trowa pulled him close, hand stroking down his braid, and Duo did.  


	6. Letters

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Current 3x4, but it's not really shown here.

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Duo shivered, his hand clenching. They hadn't even started yet and he felt like he was going to fly apart, the anticipation and his nerves wound tighter and tighter and if Trowa didn't start soon, he was going to explode and melt and he'd never get his tattoo done at all. It was his first

“It's okay, brat,” Trowa smiled reassuringly at him as he set up his kit. He'd already given Duo the run down, and the safety talk, and everything else he could think of, and now he just had to start. He paused, looking up at him, and Duo clenched his jaw and nodded

And then he felt himself expand, all that quivering tension focused on the feeling of needle in skin, and it felt like flying. It felt like the time, after the war, when Trowa had bullied him in to visiting, at the circus, and he'd flown on the trapeze and felt weightless and free. He closed his eyes and flew, riding the pain and panting, softly.

Trowa watched him with raised brows, carefully marking his skin. It was a quote, one he knew well because Duo had quoted it to him, before, and Duo had read him the whole poem,  _The Wasteland_  spilling from his lips perfectly, and Trowa thought he knew, finally, what Duo had done when he'd been alone in Deathscythe.

“Brat?” Trowa asked, finishing, and Duo gave him a lazy smile, nodding and leaning over. Trowa caught him before he fell, grinning and pushing him back in to the chair. Duo was gone, more than gone, and Trowa cleaned up as quickly as he could.

Duo sang, softly, eyes unfocused, the language familiar but unknown to Trowa's ears. He sat on the couch, reaching out to put an arm around Duo's shoulders, and Duo burrowed happily against his side, nuzzling Trowa's chest. Trowa laughed.

“You liked it that much?” He teased, and Duo nodded, still wearing the same lazy smile, eyes dilated.

“It was amazing. It was like...like falling off a cliff,” he breathed, and Trowa knew exactly what he meant, the exhilaration of the free fall, the rush and the adrenaline, and he smiled and leaned to rub their noses together, stroking Duo's hair. He looked up at the knock at the door, Quatre smiling from the doorway.

“How'd the first tattoo go?” He asked, grinning, eyes lit up. Whatever Duo was feeling was strong, if it was calling Quatre out of his study and in to Trowa's workshop. Duo beamed at him, reaching out with his hand and wiggling his fingers. Laughing, Quatre caught them, sitting on Duo's other side and reading the script on his wrist. Duo watched, almost vibrating as he waited.

“This looks beautiful, Duo,” he said, finally, and Duo laughed, happily, and preened, even though all he'd done was hold still. 


	7. Look

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Mentions of Bad Use of Science, Medical Experiments, Alcohol Use, Light Homophobia (And they get theirs)

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

The first time Trowa really saw Duo, they were at a bar. He had his head on the table, hand around a bottle of vodka, and Duo was drunk on whiskey and anger.

“I can't fucking believe that asshole,” he growled, knocking back another shot, and Trowa didn't know if he meant Heero or J. He didn't think it mattered anymore, because hermano was gone, had left them to live, and with the last rational part of his brain, Trowa knew Heero had to go, needed to go, but it still sucked. Somewhere his brother, his baby brother, was drugged and vivisected, alive only through science and the will of Duo, who had made sure that Heero knew if he didn't go back, he'd be going after him.

Duo took another shot, then slid an arm around Trowa's waist. Right now, their Perfect Soldier, his Perfect Soldier, was being tortured under the guise of progress. Heero said he had to go back, needed drugs only they could give to stabilize his body, and Duo hated that need, hated that they'd instilled it in him. He felt bowed under the weight of what they carried, even now, four years after the war was over. Trowa leaned against him, and for a moment the burdened was shared.

“What if he doesn't come back?” Duo asked, mouth muffled against Trowa's hair. Trowa pressed his side against Duo, hearing every question he was afraid to ask, like “what if he dies?” and “what if you die?” and “what if he doesn't know?” Trowa turned, nuzzling Duo's shoulder.

“Come on, brat. He'll come home,” he nudged Duo with his elbow, watching him and the slow ease of tension from his shoulders. Duo turned and licked his cheek, and Trowa beamed, nudging him out of the booth, nodding his head towards a group of men with open disgust on their faces. Duo slid out, eyes flickering, then laughed as he was suddenly whirled and dipped, Trowa's lips moving silently against his ear.

“You wanna play, Shini?” Trowa's voice was impish and playful and Duo grinned and nodded. Only Trowa could call him that, and it was their play name, a way to signal the shift.

The fight was over before it began, and Duo laughed as Trowa bowed extravagantly, offering his arm with a formal “May I?” Duo took his arm, and they clung to each other, Duo's laughter wild and unhinged, bouncing off the brick walls and infecting Trowa, who was soon laughing with him, grabbing his hands and dragging him in to a waltz.

Trowa sang loudly in Russian, and Duo joined. Trowa was struck all at once by the wild, feral thing in his arms, dancing and looking human in a mask as good as his own. 


	8. Beginnings

**Notes:** Many, many thanks to Tina, my lovely and wonderful beta.

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in.

 **This Part Specific:** infidelity, implied NCS

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

Trowa would say later that he had tried to resist. And he had, but Duo was warm, and inviting, fingers already clinging to his hair. Duo understood, was understanding, and Trowa took what he offered freely, allowing reality to fade under the taste and feel of Duo's tongue.

It was Trowa's teeth and Duo's nails, the arch of his back, the tensing of his thigh. And when Duo slid his hand over the curve of his ass, Trowa gave in. It wasn't his first time, but it was his first choosing, and Duo's hands on his thighs were gentle. Trowa slide his hands in to Duo's hair, tugging his mouth closer. The braid was gone, their clothing was gone, and Trowa was gone, too, letting go for the first time since Quatre—

"Trowa," Duo moaned in to his mouth, voice lower, huskier, and Trowa let himself sink again under the waves of pleasure, under the knowledge that Duo was there, would let him drown without holding him under. They spent each other over and over, bodies trembling, exhausted, littered with bites and bruises and blood.

Trowa's hands were unsteady, washing semen out of Duo's hair with all the nervousness of a new lover. And when Duo turned and smiled at him over his shoulder, cheeks still flushed, lips still swollen Trowa knew that's what he was. New to Duo, to himself, and the way Duo's sated expression reminded him of the lions after feeding, evoked the same level of tenderness. He took a shaky breath, leaning their foreheads together. Brow furrowing, Duo turned, gently brushing Trowa's hair back from his eyes.

"Trowa?" Duo cupped his cheek, stroking it, and Trowa kissed the thin skin of Duo's wrist, balancing on a wire.

Afterward, with Duo's hair damp and loose, filling his nose with sandalwood and citrus, Trowa wept. Duo's head was pillowed on his shoulder, his arms around his waist. He slept quietly, pressed tight to Trowa's side. Trowa inhaled against his scalp, breathing him in, hand tangled in the strands of hair he'd learned to love, over the years.

He thought of the man in his bed, at home, wearing his ring. Of crossed arms, and power struggles, and raised voices, sharp and accusing. He thought of impish eyes and curved lips. Of the offer of release and warm legs tight around his waist, of the man who didn't belong to him whispering his name with reverence and and a question, a prayer ended too soon.

Trowa closed his eyes and let himself fall.


	9. Outside

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Use of Pot

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Trowa loved the balcony. It was his favorite part of the penthouse. He relaxed in to the cushions and pillows, starring up at the sky and taking a drag from his hookah. It was a cool night, and he was looking forward to spending time with Duo, who was coming over to chat and smoke. It was Wednesday, their smoke night, and Trowa was looking forward to company.

“Hey,” Duo grinned, flopping next to him. Trowa grinned in greeting, nudging him with his elbow. Nudging back, Duo reached for the hose.

“Rough day?” Trowa exhaled a long plume of smoke, already high, spread against the pillows like butter. Duo nodded, lying back and resting his feet in Trowa's lap. Absently, Trowa took one of his feet in his hands, digging his thumbs in to the muscle.

“Fuck, that feels good,” Duo pressed in to Trowa's hand, head back on the pillows, and Trowa chuckled.

“Hermano can do this, too,” Trowa teased, working the arch of Duo's foot. He knew because he'd taught Heero himself, during the war. Duo was making incoherent noises, head thrown back against the pillow, cheeks flushed, and Trowa smirked. He'd have to tell Heero about this, later. He reached, tugging the hose, and Duo let him, eyes opening, dark violet eyes watching as he inhaled. Trowa felt self-conscious, tipping his head back to inhale, over aware of the way Duo's eyes lingered on his throat. He flushed, exhaling and handing the hose back, fingers brushing Duo's. Shivering, Trowa switched feet.

“How are you and Quat? You two talk yet?” Duo watched Trowa, unaware of his stare, even as his eyes slid over his jaw and down his chest. There weren't marks, anymore, and he knew there wouldn't be. It had been too long since L2. Since they'd run in to each other and then slept together, all the pieces of Trowa's life with Quatre showing signs of wear, of an ill fit.

“Yeah. He talked,” Trowa shrugged. Quatre was trying, but he wasn't getting it, and Trowa wondered if the problem was him. If maybe he wasn't explaining it right, or if he was asking too much of someone that had only been with him for half a year. Maybe they'd rushed, in to marriage and everything. Duo nudged him, stretching his legs out.

“Stop. It's not your fault,” he took the hose back, inhaling. Trowa's lips quirked.

“How do you do that? Always know what I'm thinking?” He ran his hand over Duo's ankle.

“Magic,” Duo smirked, and Trowa, looking in to sultry eyes, believed him. 


	10. Simple

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** They smoke pot. 

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Duo answered the door and grinned. Trowa was leaning against the door frame, holding a box of art supplies in one hand and a bag of pot in the other. He laughed, tugging Trowa in and shutting the door. Trowa flopped on his couch, setting his box on the floor and the pot on the table.

“You got papers?” He grinned, and Duo winked.

“Nope. No pedigrees here,” he laughed, flopping next to him and handing Trowa a pipe. It was glass, the Cheshire Cat, and Trowa'd bought it for him for his birthday, last year, to celebrate their costumes. It was his favorite, and Trowa packed it and handed it to him, letting him have first hit. He inhaled with a smile, sinking back against the couch. He turned, resting his head on the arm of the couch, feet in Trowa's lap.

“Shit, this is good,” Duo grinned. Trowa always had the best stuff, and Duo was never really surprised, not when Trowa was also a mercenary. Trowa took the pipe from him, taking his own hit and grinning, unable to help being smug, just a little. He handed it back to Duo, shaking his head.

“I'm not giving you a foot rub again, Shini,” Trowa teased. It was dangerous, he knew, the sounds Duo made were erotic, and they were supposed to leave that night on L2. They were supposed to be walking away like it have never happened.

“Well, fine,” Duo pouted, inhaling, then holding the pipe over his head, expression impish. Trowa growled, playfully, leaning to grab it, and Duo arched, holding it farther and grinning, blowing smoke in to Trowa's face and giggling. He was lost the moment he looked down, Trowa knew, with Duo flushed and giggling, eyes impish and beautiful, and he leaned down to kiss him, hand closing on his wrist.

The noise Duo made was surprised, sliding in to a moan as he kissed back, the hand not holding the pipe cupping the back of Trowa's head, and he pressed upwards against him and panted as the kiss broke.

“We should paint,” he swallowed, and Duo nodded, setting the pipe on the table and moving to set up the space. The painted together once a month, and when Duo stripped off his shirt and turned to see Trowa do the same, he shivered, eying the muscles moving under Trowa's skin, the tattoos and the way his hair fell over his face. Their gaze met, and crackled, and Trowa was on him, kissing him and he slid his hands over his back and in to his hair and tugged, hard.

They only got paint on each other, that day, their skin splattered with primary colors and the long strokes of Trowa's fingers on Duo's thighs, hand prints on Trowa's back. They laughed, and kissed, and Duo circled Trowa's nipple slowly with the paint brush, lips curving at the way he moaned. 


	11. Accusation

**Notes:** Many, many thanks to Tina, my lovely and wonderful beta.

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in.

 **This Part Specific:** None

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

Duo winced, the bricks of the wall behind him biting in to his skin. Trowa's hands were on his shoulders, shoving him back as he growled in his face, eyes sharp with anger. He swallowed, glaring in to smoldering green, and gripped Trowa's arms, ready to push him away. Trowa was bigger and stronger, and Duo could feel the difference pressed against him.

"What are you doing?" Trowa's voice was low, angry, and his hands tightened on Duo's shirt as he tried to twist away. Trowa knew all of his tricks. The hands on his shirt lifted, and Duo was eye level. Trowa was breathless with rage, with something Duo was too afraid to name, and he clutched at Trowa's wrists.

"Why don't you come to me?" the words made Duo freeze. He stared at Trowa, then shoved him, hard and fast and brutal, body tensed for the fall. Trowa stumbled, eyed widening. He growled, then glared as Duo shoved him again.

"You're married," Duo spat, body tensed, waiting for Trowa to push back. To fight him, to yell, to do anything but what he did: flinch. Trowa flinched, eyes snapping closed. Duo swallowed.

"You're married, Tro. I can't just...come to you," Duo looked down, looked away, arms crossing over his chest. He picked at his sleeve, sliding his finger in to the fishnet.

"I come to you," Trowa's voice was soft, intent with remembered passion, and Duo could feel his mouth, his lips, teasing his skin. Taking a step back, Duo found himself back against the wall, softer, without the hard heat of Trowa against his chest. Trowa did come to him, came with him, and Duo welcomed him, wanted him, met him thrust for thrust. He bit his lip, shivering, and jumped as Trowa's hand cupped his cheek.

"I—Trowa," Duo shivered as Trowa stepped in to him. The hand on his cheek slid, cupping his chin, tilting it up. It was a warm, familiar touch, and Duo's knees felt like water. Stroking Duo's lower lip with his thumb, Trowa leaned in, kissing him, just once. It was enough. Duo's clutched at Trowa's shirt for balance.

"Please, Duo," Trowa stroked his jaw. Trowa was jealous and scared and guilty, and Duo wanted to be able to shoulder that, too. They were comrades, brothers-in-arms, more than brothers, and Duo could feel Trowa's pulse next to his own. He turned his face, leaning in to the calloused palm. Trowa was safe, was family, and already knew what Duo needed. He looked up through his eyelashes, then nodded, nipping at Trowa's fingers.

"Are you free tonight?" Trowa's mouth was on his before he finished his sentence. Duo let go with a moan, hands full of Trowa's hair.


	12. Silver

**Notes:** Thank you to Mako for bein' a beta!  

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

 **This Part Specific:** Knifeplay, Kink, Light bloodplay, bondage

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

The first time Duo came to him, he pushed Trowa against the wall and growled against his mouth. It was a week after Heero had left Zechs, after they'd realized the collar covered signs of abuse, and Duo's mouth was full of Trowa's cock before he knew it, hands tight in Duo's hair. He yanked, drawing Duo up, teeth closing around his lower lip. It was only the third time they'd done this.

“Tell me what you want,” Trowa panted, braid tight around his hand, tugging Duo to the bedroom. Quatre was gone, away on business, and Trowa's guilt evaporated as Duo ran his nails down his back, biting down on his ear.

“Break me,” Duo hissed, urgent and needy, ripping Trowa's shirt and biting along his chest. Trowa moaned, then reached, stilling Duo. He needed to be clear, needed this to be clear.

“Duo, if I start...” If he started, he wasn't sure he'd be able to stop, not with Duo there, Duo wanting it. Duo have him a heated look, pupils dilated. He needed to be out of control, to give his control away, and Trowa knew, knew how and how much, and he took, both hands open on Duo's cheeks, kissing him.

He used his new rope, binding Duo's wrists behind his back. He blindfolded him, then sat back, running his eyes over Duo's body. Duo shuddered, head tipping back as Trowa tugged on his braid. He ran his nails lightly down Duo's chest, watching as Duo's lips parted, his breath hitched.

It was only Duo he could be like this with: feral and wild and away from everything else. Just the two of them and the need for sex and violence and the taste of blood. Trowa clamped Duo's nipples and ringed his cock, connecting them with a thin chain. Duo was rock hard, hips bucking as Trowa tugged, and he opened his box of razors with reverence.

The razors had been a gift from Duo. They were pure silver, and sharp enough that Trowa could cut someone without pain. They had handles carved with death and beautiful women, and he opened them slowly, with a smile. Trowa drew the blade down Duo's stomach, leaving the skin unbroken, following it with his tongue. He circled Duo's nipple, watching as Duo writhed and finally cried out, head thrown back. Trowa cut a thin line down Duo's throat, sucking, then lapping the mark, teasing his cock with his hand.

“Please, Nashi,” Duo panted, throat bared, bucking hard in to the teasing strokes. Duo's voice was rough and low and Trowa stopped sucking his neck and started sucking his cock, teasing and stroking and swallowing as Duo broke and shouted his name.

“Better?” Trowa asked, Duo unbound, lazing against his chest. Duo nodded, licking his cheek.

“Yeah,” Duo purred, and kissed him. 


	13. Sunset

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** None

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

The beach was warm, wind blowing gently, and Trowa stood with his arms around Duo's waist, his chin on his shoulder. Duo stroked his arms, resting back against him. The sun was setting, bathing their naked skin in gold and fire. Trowa kissed the side of Duo's head, tugging him back towards the hammock. Duo smiled and followed, letting Trowa pull him down against his chest.

Duo's head rested above Trowa's heart, Trowa's fingers resting in his hair. They were sticky, covered in sand and semen, despite their best efforts, and Duo's nose was sunburnt. Trowa couldn't remember ever being happier.

“Do you ever wish we could stay here?” Duo asked, voice soft and hesitant. Trowa smiled and cupped his hip, stroking the tanned skin.

“Naked, with you, on a beach? Hell yeah,” Trowa laughed, softly, at the indignant noise from Duo. He looked down, breath caught by sparking violet eyes and an upturned, sunburnt nose. He placed a light kiss on that nose, and Duo sighed.

“I'm serious,” Duo settled back against Trowa's chest. Trowa stared up at the skin, stroking Duo's hair. He knew. He knew what Duo was really asking: don't you wish we could be together? And Trowa did. He really, really did. But he couldn't leave Quatre. And so he said nothing, running his fingers through Duo's hair again. Duo sat up, straddling him, hair falling over his face. Trowa tucked it behind his ear, then cupped his cheek. With a shaky breath, Duo covered Trowa's hand with his own.

“What are we doing, Trowa?” Duo asked against his palm. Trowa swallowed. Duo never used his name. It was always “Tro” or “Asshole” or “Nashi” or “mi yehrhore” and lately something he couldn't wrap his tongue around. Trowa stroked his cheekbone and closed his eyes.

“I don't know,” he answered, finally. Duo watched his face; the clench of his jaw, the flutter of his eyelid. He smiled, leaning in and kissing his lower lip. Trowa's breath hitched. He whimpered.

“Duo, I'm—“ Trowa cut off as Duo shushed him.

“I know. Just promise you'll tell me? When you don't want me anymore?” Duo's voice was soft, and Trowa felt cold suddenly, sitting up and cupping the back of Duo's head. They kissed hungrily, and Trowa slid his hands in to Duo's hair, holding him and letting out a soft, needy moan. Duo's hands were in his hair, and when Trowa pulled back, he rested their foreheads together.

“I will never not want you,” he panted, expression fierce. Trowa didn't know what they were doing, or how to fix anything, but he knew that he wanted Duo right where he was for as long as he could have him. Duo touched his cheek and smiled, lighting up, matching the sun on the waves for brilliance. 


	14. Restless

**Notes:** Many, many thanks to Tina, my lovely and wonderful beta.

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in.

 **This Part Specific:** Drug and Alcohol Use. 

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

Trowa flung paint at the canvas, shirt off. He frowned, drawing in on his blunt, then flung the brush down as well. It was evening, the windows of his studio thrown open, catching the ocean breeze. Sanc was beautiful at this time of year, the sun warm on the sea, reflecting the lack of clouds perfectly. Trowa leaned against the window frame,smoking, finally flicking the blunt out the window. 

It had been a month. Duo was undercover, off planet, and his fights with Quatre had grown, swelling like the summer sea, threatening to drown him in their wake. With Duo here, he could forget, could lose himself in the planes of Duo's body, wrap himself in the scent of Duo's hair. With Duo gone, he was parched, a desert, and all of hsi flaws came rushing back in the hard glare of summer blue eyes. 

He turned away from the window abruptly, stalking through the studio. This space was his, away from the joint ownership of the penthouse, their house outside the city. Trowa opened the freezer, opened a bottle of vodka, and drank. Sat the bottle on the counter of the dingy kitchen and turned. He'd been painting all day. It was the same painting: the arched back, tensed calf, fingers gripping the bedpost, ropes around the wrists, violet eyes blindfolded. Sin was decadent and spread over his walls like plaster. 

Trowa picked the bottle back up, letting vodka burn through him like the need in Duo's voice, the heady sound of his moan. Trowa snarled. Threw the bottle at the wall, glass shattering like his marriage. He yanked his shirt on, running a hand through his hair as he slammed the door shut. He felt too big for his skin, felt trapped and anxious. The pavement seared his feet, hot and black and sharp against his skin as he walked. 

His lips burned, eyes burned, body burned for the touch of Duo's skin on his, the cool violet gaze watching him, in bed, or later, sprawled over the sheets, hands smooth and soft as they touched Trowa's skin. He wanted the tang of Duo's tongue against his, the sweet salt of his neck. But Duo was gone, so far he may as well be dead, and Trowa walked and walked and walked, until the road was gone and he stood in the sea, cool his feet.

His cell phone rang. 


	15. Snowflake

**Notes:** Not beta'd! 

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

 **This Part Specific:** None

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

Duo sighed, pressing his forehead to the window. The colony was cold, weather controls held ransom by the local gang of thugs, and he shivered, watching his breath fog the glass. It was late, and he wanted to go home. It was summer in Sanc, and he craved the sun, the beach, the warm weight of Trowa's gaze. The heat of his desire, hard in his hand. 

He pulled away, sliding in to an empty bed and pulling up the blankets. Duo wanted to go home, to his family, his friends, the warm circle of Trowa's arms. The cold here was thin, was too much like L2, with its harsh streets and dirty snow. He was alone, without his pack. Again. Duo pulled the blanket over his head, curling around his absence. 

Trowa was the one who knew, who understood the way loss could carve itself in to bone. Heero and Wufei were solitary, the lone wolf and the dragon, and they didn't need a half-feline in their life. Duo wrapped himself in metaphors and blankets and slept, dreaming of green-eyed lions, of a hand that fit his. 

The call came early, and Duo answered with hope. It wasn't Trowa. But he was needed at the club, and he dressed, storing wires and knives in his clothes. He would be done, soon. Soon, tomorrow, with his intuition, if this played out right, nerves tensed and tight. He texted his commander and left his sham of an apartment, slowly letting himself relax in to his alter-ego, his mission face. Shinigami wanted to go home, too. 

It was over in a flash of lights, the spray of arterial blood, and a voice rough with anger. Duo didn't stick around. He gave his report, then left, scrubbing off his persona like a fake tattoo. He was going home, going back to Sanc, and white beaches. To Trowa, who may not be there after all. Who may have remembered how much he loved blond hair and trembling thighs, the delicate skin of a pedigree pet, waiting and wanting. 

He froze at the shuttle port, hands clenching in the pockets of a jacket he'd stolen, for scent and memory, from Trowa. A month was a long time. They could've made up, made love, moved out of Sanc, to somewhere that didn't rattle with memories. Duo wanted to weep. He squared his jaw, gritting his teeth and fingering his cell. It didn't hurt to call. To see--if they were still in this, together. 

At the third ring, he almost hung up, fingers trembling, eyes shut against a reality he couldn't face. And then it picked up, the sound of waves in the background, a month of radio silence ended in a heartbeat. 

"Duo," Trowa murmured, voice coated with relief and want and everything Duo needed. It was more than enough. Outside the port, it was snowing, and Duo climbed on to the shuttle with a smile curving his lips. 


	16. Haze

**Notes:** Not beta’d! 

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** None

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

They met like tidal waves at Trowa's door. Duo's hand in his hair, Trowa's lips on his. Duo shut the door with his foot, shoving Trowa against the wall, pinning him, body electric and throbbing. Trowa was hot beneath his hands, moaning in to his mouth, and brimming against his touch. Sliding his hands along Duo's thighs, Trowa lifted, stroking the denim and devouring his mouth.

They didn't make it to bed, or the couch, Trowa spilling himself in to Duo's mouth with abandon, head thrown back. He could taste himself on Duo's tongue, his hands sliding down his pants to wrap around his cock, stroking and running his tongue over Duo's ear, moaning in to it.

“Fucking missed you,” Trowa panted, licking semen coated fingers and swallowing Duo's face with his eyes. Taking Trowa's fingers in to his mouth, Duo sucked, tugging him to the bedroom, hands on his hips, nipping the digits.

“Need you, Nashi,” Duo moaned, pulling Trowa's body against his own, arching against him. Trowa braced himself on his hands, panting and trembling and looking down at Duo. His cheeks were flushed, lips parted and swollen, eyes hazy with pleasure and want and a month of wet dreams finally coming true.

“God, you're beautiful,” Trowa breathed in to Duo's mouth, engulfed in heat and Duo's body, Duo's scene and moans and feeling of skin against skin. Wrapping a leg around his waist, Duo met his thrust with an arch, a low happy cry, Trowa's fingers between his on the sheets. He rolled them, riding Trowa with his thrown back, throat bare, body tensing and writhing in pleasure.

Duo ran his mouth over Trowa's neck, teething his pulse, his collarbone, his nipples, tugging and tonguing the nub. Duo's fingers circled his entrance, cock hardening with the needy moans spilling like rosary from Trowa's lips. He took his time sliding in to Trowa, clinging to his hands and lips. Trowa bucked, body bare and open to Duo, to the only person he let inside—anything.

They clung to each other in sleep, breathing together, Duo's leg wrapped around Trowa's, Trowa's hands tight in Duo's hair. They were sticky and sated, nerves vibrating with the knowledge of here, of bodies close by. When Trowa woke, he ran his hand down the cool skin of Duo's side, nose against his scalp, breathing in musk and sweat and the scent he knew was his. Duo stirred, eyes fluttering open. He smiled, finger stroking Trowa's jaw, and they kissed, lazy and languid and peaceful. 


	17. Mad

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Angry!Duo, mentions of Zechs!Villain

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

“Let me go!” Duo roared and twisted, and Trowa held him, arms pinned to his sides. The lions had never been this terrifying. Duo thrashed, snarling and Trowa let him, holding him still despite his wrist. Duo writhed and finally Trowa did the only thing he could think of, biting the back of Duo's neck, hard and sharp. Duo whined, then stilled, panting.

“Let me go, dammit. It's my turn!” Duo growled, and Trowa growled back against his ear. Duo was angry, furious. Duo wanted all of Zechs' blood spilled over his hands and pooling on the floor. Trowa couldn't blame him. He wanted him dead, too, and he'd already had his go, taunting Zechs and cutting off a lock of hair. Zechs had gone wild, and Trowa didn't know how he'd escaped with only a bite, his wrist throbbing with the memory.

“Heero needs—“ Trowa cut off, wrestling with Duo and finally pinning him to the wall, panting. “Duo! Look, we can go outside, after, if you want, and fight, or fuck, or whatever you need. But right now, Wufei is gone and Heero is scared, and he needs you.”

“My family is broken!” Duo snarled, shoving back against the hard line of Trowa's body. “And I'm here! The Dragon got his turn! You got a turn! When do I get to protect what's mine!”

Trowa sighed, nuzzling behind Duo's ear.

“I know it sucks, Shini, but Heero needs you right now, and you'll hate yourself if you leave. You'll get your turn, I promise,” Trowa knew it was a promise he couldn't keep, knew it was cruel to shove Heero at him, but Trowa wanted Duo safe.

“I hate you,” Duo whispered against the wall, Trowa's arms around his waist. Trowa swallowed, lips pressed against the nape of Duo's neck. It hurt, even if Duo didn't mean it, even if it was a month of pent-up rage and fear letting loose on the only target there: him. Trowa kissed the back of Duo's neck, hugging him, then stepped back. Duo rested against the wall for a few minutes, then turned, eyes dead. Trowa watched him shakes his head and square his shoulders, going to greet Heero with the soft lie of a smile.

After, they faced each other outside, and when Duo hurled himself at Trowa, he caught him, read to take any punishment he'd give. Duo swung and Trowa let it connect with his jaw. Duo hissed, then whimpered, cupping Trowa's cheek.

“Asshole. Why didn't you duck” he whined, resting their foreheads together.   

“Because you need it,” Trowa was breathless, jaw radiating, unsurprised to find Duo's mouth on his. 


	18. Prepared

**Notes:** Thank you to Mako for bein' a beta!  

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

 **This Part Specific:** Refernces to past 1x2 and current 1x2x5. 

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

“How long have you been fucking him?” Heero's lips were at his ear, voice barely louder than the throb of the club. Duo felt like ice, like the chill of Russia, despite Heero's body against his chest, Trowa's body against his back. Heero's hand was on his hip, Trowa's arm around his waist as they danced. They were all out, together. Quatre was laughing, wedged between Relena and Hilde, Wufei chatting with Noin at the bar.

“I—“ Duo swallowed, unable to do anything but move between their bodies. He choked, then slipped out from between them, heading for the bathroom with Heero on his heels. Trowa danced, watching, frowning until Hilde stepped up, throwing her arms around her neck. He laughed, dipping her, and Duo shut the bathroom door, shaking. Heero locked it.

“Duo,” Heero pulled him in, running his hand down Duo's braid, and he swallowed and rested his forehead on Heero's shoulder.

“It's....only a couple of weeks? Or so?” It was true, the first time had been two months ago, a lifetime ago, and then out of nowhere and on the couch in Duo's studio, they'd kissed and been lost. They were careful, so careful, but Duo knew Heero's hands could read his body like braille. Heero cupped his cheek and smiled, expression strained.

“You're thinking too hard, baka,” He teased, and Duo responded automatically, the “Your baka” handing Heero ownership without thought, the words whispered in to his palm, eyes closed. Heero pulled away.

“Duo...are you in love with him? Does Quatre know?” Heero's rapid questions made him curl, hands on the cool marble of the sink. Duo shook his head and shook and couldn't find the words to explain. Heero turned him, gently, sighing, fingers as soft as steel. Heero lifted him like a doll, setting him on the counter and bringing him eye level.

Duo licked his lips, and looked in to endless blue. Heero had been his first everything, and he and Wufei were there for him, always. It tumbled out of him, the exorcism of a demon he couldn't name. It was need and desire and the feeling of fragmenting to reform, better, more whole, and of course he loved Trowa, Trowa was patyet, mi yehrhore, wasn't his, but Trowa rose and fell beneath his fingers like clay. Trowa drew his body tight and shot him like an arrow in to the stars. Heero kissed his forehead, then his nose.

“My beautiful baka,” he sighed, shaking his head with a smile. He loved Duo, but he had Wufei, too, and they were both too full of hurts Duo couldn't heal to give him what he needed. Heero knew, then, they had lost him. When Trowa knocked, tensed and ready to fight, Heero rolled his eyes and grinned, and teased him about not being able to keep it in his pants. Trowa snorted, hand finding Duo's, holding it while Heero made them promise not to tell Wufei.  


	19. Summer

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** None

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Duo laughed, running down the beach with Wufei close on his heels. Heero and Trowa watched from the water, grinning. Relena and Quatre waded out to join them, laughing as Duo yelped, Wufei tackling him to the ground.

“You'd think he'd know better,” Quatre grinned, shaking his head. Trowa snorted, watching Wufei stuff sand in to Duo's swimsuit. Heero nudged him, laughing and covering his mouth as Duo's wiggling revealed most of his skin. Trowa flushed a little, glared at Heero, then ducked in to the water.

“Ha!” Wufei shouted, triumphant, walking back in to the water. Duo followed, briefly diving under water to rinse off. Heero laughed harder at Duo's petulant expression, even as Relena nudged him in the ribs, trying to cover her own broad grin. Duo stuck his tongue out at them, then bent forward, looking down at Trowa right as he surfaced, hitting a surprised Duo in the face with his head. Duo grunted, blood pouring from his nose.

“Oh shit, Duo, I'm sorry,” Trowa looked sheepish, reaching out to steady him. Duo growled, head back.

“Just take me inside, okay?” He wanted to find a way to stop the bleeding without getting salt water up his nose. Trowa nodded, following him out of the water and looking guilty.

They reached the cabana quickly, and Trowa handed Duo towels and pinched his nose, looking down in to amused violet eyes. Trowa tilted his head, brow furrowing.

“If you wanted me alone, Tro, you only had to ask,” Duo teased, voice nasally and impish. Trowa rolled his eyes but grinned. The bleeding stopped, finally, and Trowa tossed the towels on to the counter. He eyed Duo's face.

“You look like a monster,” he laughed, and Duo mock-growled, snapping at him, and Trowa laughed harder, pushing him towards the bathroom. “Go clean up, brat. I'll wait.”

“Not gonna help?” Duo winked, and Trowa flushed and laughed and followed him, shutting the door. He leaned back against the closed door, watching as Duo washed his face. Drying himself, Duo turned and smirked, moving closer to Trowa. He winked, then pouted.

“My nose hurts,” he whined, and Trowa snorted, leaning in and licking his nose. Duo scrunched it and laughed, and Trowa grinned, leaning in to the lips that came to meet his.


	20. Denial

**Notes:** Thank you to Mako for bein' a beta!  

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

 **This Part Specific:** None 

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Trowa wasn't surprised to see Heero in his office. He sat his coat on the desk, then turned to face him, shoulders squared and tensed. Heero snorted.

“Relax. I'm not here to kick your ass,” Heero grinned a little, watching as Trowa frowned.

“Going to warn me not to hurt him?” Trowa's frown deepened as Heero laughed and shook his head.

“I don't have to. You're so sickeningly in love with him, you'd kill yourself if you hurt him,” Heero snickered. “Assuming he didn't kill you first.”

“He would, wouldn't he?” Trowa grinned, leaning back against the desk. He didn't bother to address Heero's assumption. He was fishing, and Trowa knew it, so he waited, watching Heero calmly.

“So what are you going to do?” Heero asked, finally, leaning next to him and crossing his arms over his chest. Trowa shrugged. He hadn’t thought about it. Why should he? It was just release, just two bodies with practiced hands and specific needs, helping each other reach levels of pleasure Trowa had never experienced. Heero nudged him again, frowning.

“Why do anything? Duo and I don't have a relationship,” Trowa was conscious of Heero's eyes narrowing. The room, felt colder, suddenly, and Trowa turned to look down at him. “Look, Heero, I'm married, and Duo has you and Wufei. It's just—“

“Just what?” Heero growled. He was glaring, hands balled in to fists.

“Just playing. We're just playing,” Trowa looked away. They played, and it was sex, yeah, and it was intimate, but Trowa was married. Quatre just didn't understand. He tried, but he was too afraid of pain to give Trowa what he needed. To take.

“Playing,” Heero repeated. He was stiff, and tense, and Trowa was glad that they were friends, brothers, because he was sure that was the only reason Heero hadn't punched him. It looked like Heero might punch him anyway.

“Yeah,” Trowa swallowed, then flinched as Heero pushed away from the desk.

“So help me, Barton,” Heero's eyes flashed dangerously, and Trowa remembered just how much strength was held in those muscles. “You'd better get your shit together. You—god damn it,”

Heero stalked to the door, throwing out words like “selfish” and “arrogant” and “prick.” Trowa watched him with growing anxiety.

It was just play. That was all. Trowa sank heavily in to his chair and held his head in his hands. Just play. Even if Duo's head fit perfectly beneath his chin, and he could open himself to Duo without being swallowed or filled. Trowa shut his eyes, remembered windswept hair and a hammock, the feeling of arms around his waist, and lied to himself. They had to stop.   


	21. Thousand

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Alcohol Use

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Trowa was drunk. Duo couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Trowa this drunk. He leaned heavily on Duo, arm around his shoulder, face in Duo's hair, and Duo carried him forward, arm around his waist. They staggered, and Duo laughed, nuzzling his chest as they went. Trowa was singing loudly, off key and in French, and Duo kicked the door to the studio open with relief, dragging him in and dropping him on the couch.

“Where are you going?” Trowa pouted as Duo walked towards the door, reaching for him. Duo grinned, shutting the door and moving back towards the couch, sitting and laughing as Trowa slid on to his lap. He ran a hand through his hair, smiling as Trowa leaned in to the strokes.

“Aren't you cute,” Duo teased, laughing as Trowa gave him a smug look. It was just the two of them, Heero and Wufei off on a date, Quatre staying late at the office, with Relena. It was rare, to have the house to themselves, and Trowa was celebrating by singing, loudly, arms around Duo's neck. He'd been this drunk when Duo'd picked him up, and Duo still had no idea why.

“Sing with me, Shini-brat,” Trowa pleaded, nuzzling Duo's cheek. He grinned, suddenly and impishly, and grabbed Duo's face, licking a long, wet streak up his cheek. Duo groaned, then chuckled, shaking his head.

“You are very drunk,” he watched Trowa nod and beam. He wondered if it had anything to do with why he hadn't been over all week. Not since Heero'd gone to talk to him. Duo hesitated, then reached out, brushing back his hair.

“Hey, baby. Does this have anything to do with Heero?” he asked, softly, trailing the tips of his fingers down Trowa's cheek. Trowa chased his fingers with his lips, nipping them, and duo shivered. Trowa nodded, leaning in to messily suck down is jaw. Tilting his head back, Duo slid his hands in to his hair

“We need to stop,” Trowa murmured, teeth trailing down his pulse, and Duo went numb, pulling back and looking at him. Trowa was panting, a little, looking confused and lost. He nuzzled Duo's cheek, then slid off his lap, tugging him.

“Sleep, brat,” Trowa tugged him, and Duo moved mechanically, sliding in to bed and curling up with Trowa. They needed to stop, and maybe Trowa didn't want him, after all. He curled, fitting easily under Trowa's chin, and listened to him breathe, heart breaking. It felt like losing Deathscythe, again, something he'd stolen he'd thought he could call his fracturing in to thousands of pieces. 


	22. Order

**Notes:** Thank you to Mako for bein’ a beta!  

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

 **This Part Specific:** References to 3x4

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Trowa glared at Duo, arms over his chest. There was no way he was taking him to Russia, to a boss fight. Duo would stick out, was too loud and beautiful and cocky, and in his face, now, poking him hard in the chest.

“You are not going alone,” Duo was angrier than Trowa could ever remember him being, as angry as the night Heero had come home, pale and cold and broken, bruised from rough hands on his neck and thighs.

“Brat—“

“Don't you fucking 'brat' me, Barton,” Duo snarled, snarled at him, and that's when Trowa knew they were both lost. No one else fought him like this, for himself. He had a fistful of braid, and armful of angry lover, and a mouthful of Duo, touched that someone, anyone, this one person, could feel so passionately about him, and whether he lived or died. Could feel enough to hurl himself in to the middle of a tradition he knew nothing about

“If you think I'm gonna let you get yourself killed in some sick Russian dick measuring contest without being there to back you up, you're the biggest fucking—“ Trowa cut Duo's rant off with a tight hug, inhaling the scent of his hair. Against his chest, Duo calmed, although he still grumbled. He hair was long and loose down his back, and Trowa ran a hand through it slowly.

“Fine. You can come,” he nosed Duo's temple, feeling smug and possessed and very pleased with himself. He had Duo, who was the best person to watch his back. Duo shoved him, gently.

“Good. Asshole,” he glared at Trowa, then grinned, and Trowa grinned back. Duo licked his cheek, then hugged him tightly, and Trowa hugged back, smiling and resting his chin in Duo's hair. There was a spark Duo had, a roughness that Trowa's own roughness could cling to, that Quatre had polished clean in boardrooms, and Trowa understood, finally, his own unhappiness.

“Thanks, brat,” Trowa looked a little shy, feeling a lot like he had the night he'd finally kissed Quatre. He could tell by the tilt of Duo's head that he knew Trowa was thanking him for more than just Russia. Duo headbutted him, rubbing his cheek along his jaw, then pulled back and smiled.

It was a smile Trowa was slowly beginning to realize was only for him, for their moments together, and he felt inadequate, like a blanket full of water. He wanted to go back, to Heero, to tell him how wrong he was.

“For you? Anything,” Duo half-teased, and Trowa felt hot and liquid, like honey left in the sun.  

 


	23. Formal

**Notes:** Not beta’d! 

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

 **This Part Specific:** None

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Trowa cried softly against duo's shirt, hands fisting the material, jaw clenched. He clung, shoulders shaking, and Duo rocked him, gently, stroking his back. Trowa hiccuped, then inhaled, wanting the scent of his lover to calm, to sooth, the clear the ache in his chest. It didn't.

“Hurts,” Trowa whined, hands tightening on the fabric. Duo rocked him, pulling back to wipe his cheeks with his thumbs, following the path with his lips.

“I know, baby. Shh, baby, I know,” and he did know, he knew, and Trowa pressed his face to the crook of Duo's neck, sobbing. Duo had been there through all of it, from the first kiss at Quatre's penthouse in New York to the nervous, frantic search for an engagement ring. Duo had stood with them at their wedding, and Trowa knew Duo would stand with him now, too.

He held Quatre's wedding rin in his hand, the cold metal unflinching in the head of his clenched palm. He'd left, finally, and Quatre had been clear: don't come back. Trowa felt broken, a cracked egg, all o himself spilled out. They had fought again, and the months of being stone and brick had ended with Trowa's fist through the drywall. It had been cathartic, a release he hadn't known he'd needed, and Trowa had let go of all the words he'd been holding for months. Quatre hadn't picked up the pieces.

Quatre never had.

But Duo did. Duo was there, his arms warm and close, heartbeat strong in Trowa's ear. Trowa took a deep breath, pulled back, wiping his face with his sleeve.

“I'm sorry,” Trowa's voice wavered like a sheet of metal, and Duo kissed his cheek, running his nails over his scalp.

“Hey. We lean on each other, baby,” Duo settled on his side, lying on the couch, holding Trowa against his chest. He clung, taking long, deep breaths, reeling with the knowledge that it was over. Everything was over.

Trowa found Duo's hand with his own, fitting their fingers together. He wasn't alone. He had Duo. They had Heero, and Wufei, and Relena, and one day, Quatre would calm, would quiet, and the'd have him again, too. He pressed his face against Duo's chest, calming under the stready run of fingers down his back.

“Thanks, brat,” Trowa murmured against Duo's chest.

“For you? Anytime,” Duo kissed the top of his head, holding him as he cried and drifted.  

 


	24. Companion

**Notes:** Not beta’d! 

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

 **This Part Specific:** Reference to past 1x2x5, current 2x3

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Duo ran his hand down Eliot's back, smiling. The kitten was curled next to Trowa's head, purring and kneading the pillow. He slid out of bed, walking to the kitchen, heating water for coffee or tea. Eliot chirped as he left, raising his head, then followed, rubbing against Duo's legs as he stood at the sink. Duo wasn't surprised.

Eliot had been born in Heero's closet at the palace, on his best silk shirt, while Duo looked on in wonder, leaning against Heero's side. They held hands, and Duo watched life happen for the first time with Heero's head on top of his. Eliot was white, the runt, sticky with afterbirth, and Yume wouldn't clean him. He wouldn't nurse. Heero had frowned, gone on about nature, and birth defects, and Duo had begged him to shut up with tears in his eyes. Had begged for the tiny body, mewing loudly on Heero's shirt, and Heero said yes, like he always did with Duo. Eliot had gone home tucked down Duo's shirt.

Duo was on the phone with Trowa when Heero got home from the palace that night, Wufei already tucked in to bed. They were arguing, Trowa wanting to take care of the kitten himself, and Heero plucked the phone from Duo's fingers with a growl, snapping it shut. He'd kissed the tip of Duo's nose, stroking the newborn kitten with a finger, and smiled.

“Trowa's an asshole. Just google it. That kitten is yours,” He'd said, yawning, heading to the bedroom, to the lover who wasn't sitting on the couch, marveling at the life he was now responsible for.

Duo sat at the window, sipping his tea. Eliot jumped on to his lap, mewing and headbutting his stomach. He rubbed the albino kitten's ears, smiling fonldy down at him. Eliot was still tiny, even at six months, but he made up for it in energy and volume. Leaning in, Duo kissed the kitten's nose. Eliot meowed in response, headbutting Duo's jaw, and he laughed.

“Hey,” Trowas voice was breaking, like the rest of him, hoarse with tears, and Duo offered strength and glue in the form of a smile. Trowa's hand ran through his hair, down his braid, and then over Eliot's fur, drawing twin purrs of pleasure. For the first time in days, Trowa laughed, the sound chocked. Duo stood, leaving his tea on the table.

“It's late,” Duo wrapped his arm around Trowa's waist, holding Eliot against his chest, leading the way back to bed. They slept in a pile of legs and hair and fur, keeping company through the night.  

 


	25. Transformation

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Zechs as a villain! Violence and Evil, Nefarious schemes? Definitely violence. 

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Duo had been so glad to see Quatre, clinging as the blond had untied him, looking up at him and grinning and being so grateful that Quatre wasn't dead, even if Quatre were hurting Trowa. Then the door had opened, and Duo had hissed.

“You! I told you to wait outside, Barton!” Duo glared, and Trowa snorted, lifting him to his feet. Duo glared harder, drinking in his face, and Trowa gave him a small smile.

“I've never listened to you a day in my life. I'm not going to start now,” Trowa murmured, helping Duo to his feet. Duo laughed wildly, then collapsed. He wasn't surprised. Zechs' men had stabbed him and shocked him and his legs felt so weak he wasn't sure they were there. His hair hung down his back in ragged chunks, and he clawed his way towards the door, ignoring Quatre's pleas to be still. And then Trowa was there, stilling him and kneeling next to him.

“On my back, brat,” Trowa instructed, and Duo climbed on, resting on his back.

“We have to get to Wufei and Heero,” Duo kicked his sides, tugging on Trowa's shirt, and Trowa grabbed his feet.

“I'm not a horse, Duo,” he growled, and they moved. Duo's stomach rolled. He threw up, turning and leaning and splattering Trowa's boots. Trowa handed him water to rinse his mouth, and they kept moving, Duo clinging tightly to Trowa's back as they moved.

Duo saw them first, their arms around each other as they limped down the hall. Wufei looked through him. He was already dead, to Wufei, and Heero's face was stone, focused on the body in his arms. They had each other, and Duo knew he could move on, now. The knowledge warmed him, and he lost himself to the pain.

His memories for the rest of the night were Trowa-centered. He remembered the tension in Trowa's shoulders when they finally—finally—found him, waiting for them and laughing. The rigid anger as it spilled out: Zechs had been responsible from the beginning. It was a whole year of worry, beginning with the group stalking Heero, then Quatre's assassination attempt, which is how Duo got kidnapped. Trowa's brush with cage fighting, the murder pinned on Wufei. He'd even had Duo helping him, under the guise of protecting his family, and Duo felt nauseous against Trowa's back, eyes shut tight. Zechs was spilling their secret, and Trowa gripped Duo's ankles. Duo clung, pressing his face tight to Trowa's back and trying not to hear Quatre's wounded noise, not to picture the way Wufei paled further.

And then Zechs was dead, with Duo on the ground, shot, and Trowa shot in the shoulder, and Heero shouted bomb and they ran, Trowa cradling Duo against his chest and holding him and holding him and holding him, ignoring everything but the feeble beat of Duo's pulse. 


	26. Wind

**Notes:** Thank you to Mako for bein' a beta!  

 **General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

 **This Part Specific:** References to abuse. Villain!Zechs. References to 1x2x5 and 3x4.

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

  
Duo's favorite thing about the house he'd bought with Wufei was that it was on the beach. He sat on the shore, fingers in the sand, waves licking his ankles. His hair was down, loose in the breeze. Slowly, he raised his hand, pouring sand out of his fingers. It had been a week. A week since he'd woken up wedged between Heero and Wufei, Trowa keeping watching in the background. Zechs was dead, at peace, thanks to Heero.

They were all reeling. Duo was short half a foot of hair, having gained 14 stitches, a bullet wound, and internal bleeding. He'd made his way out here slowly, in stages, to get away from everyone. Heero had shut down, would speak only quiet Japanese—and only to Wufei, which hurt more than it should. Wufei had two broken legs, stitches and lacerations and he watched Duo like he was a ghost, reaching to touch and then drawing back. Zechs had told them he was dead, and instead of feeling warm about what his life mean to them, Duo felt hollow. Quatre was bruised, only, and he hung around, watching Trowa with sad eyes as he tended wounds.

Trowa, who had been shot and carried Duo out on his back, then refused to let go. Who had evened out his hair like trimming a hedge, and would speak softly to Duo in the middle of the night, when Duo let blame and rage engulf him. He should've killed Zechs when he had the change, back when Heero had finally confessed to the abuse, when Wufei had gone to jail on false charges, his family ripped open at the seams.

“Heero needed you. Wufei needed you,” Trowa would state, calm and cool and in full possession of his hair. Duo would turn away, in his own bed, and close his eyes. They needed him and he needed Trowa and Trowa didn't need anyone.

“Hey,” he said as Trowa sat down next to him, lighting a cigarette, nudging his shoulder gently in acknowledgment. Duo nudged back, smiling a little. The smoke billowed in the air.

“How's your shoulder?”

“Hurts,” Trowa grinned at him. “You should kiss it and make it better.”

“You're cute,” Duo snorted, grinning a little more. They sat in silence as Trowa smoked, and then Duo felt Trowa shift and lean in to him. He stiffened as Trowa nosed his hair.

“Heero explained about your hair...I'm so sorry, brat,” he could feel Trowa's breath against his scalp as he spoke. Duo swallowed as Trowa's fingers touched the back of his hand. He turned his hand over slowly, letting out a shaky breath as Trowa tangled their fingers together.

And then he was on Trowa's lap, face pressed against his chest, and he cried and cried and cried, for Solo and Sister Helen and Father Maxwell and Heero and Wufei and everyone else he'd never been able to save.  


	27. Diamonds

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Quatre is kind of an ass? Is that a warning?

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Duo woke up with a jolt, panting and covered in sweat, sitting straight up and staring at Quatre. Gently, Quatre reached out, pushing him back down and brushing back his bangs. He looked a little sheepish.

“I'm sorry, Duo. I didn't mean to wake you,” It was a half-truth. Duo grinned a little, still breathing heavily, and waved it off. He nudged him with his shoulder a little, then winced, the bullet wound searing his side for a moment. Quatre hissed slightly, then tapped his nose.

“Stop that. Don't move,” he sighed, shaking his head. “Duo, you're really not in any position to be moving.”

“I know,” Duo frowned a bit, expression a little petulant. Quatre raised an eyebrow.

“So how did you get in the hammock?”

“I uh...oh.” Duo paused, then grinned at Quatre. The blond laughed, shaking his head and leaning over Duo. It was easy for Duo to forget, in the moment, everything that Quatre had done, that Quatre had said. All the tiny bits of Trowa burned by Quatre's long, slow realization that he wasn't old enough to settle down, that he loved Trowa but wasn't in love with him, that he couldn't give Trowa any of the things he needed because it meant turning his back on all the glittering diamonds he was used to, and he wasn't ready, yet.

“I wanted to talk to you,” Quatre said, softly, pulling a chair over and sitting next to the hammock. Duo wiggled a little, trying to get in to a good position to see Quatre, and he reached out, pushing Duo gently back down. “Stop that.”

“Sorry, Q,” Duo grinned a little, sheepish, and Quatre grinned back. He wondered if he'd ever call Quatre “little buddy” again, if they'd ever be able to all sit in a room and not think of all the tiny betrayals scattered like rice between them.

“Trowa told me how it started,” Quatre's voice was quiet and soft. It wasn't what Duo expected. He'd expected more anger, more fire, more something from this boy, this man, that he'd seen destroy mobile suits and colonies. Instead he sounded tired, and Duo nodded, feeling the weight of that weariness on his chest.

“Thank you for being there for him,” it was soft, and Duo met his eyes and understood that Quatre was tired, too tired for what was being asked of him, too tired of trying to balance and maintain and keep everything together, and he understood that stepping down from W.E.I and leaving Preventers was an act of self-preservation, and selfishness, and maybe a step in the right direction. Too late.

“Someone has to be,” Duo whispered, quietly. Because Quatre looked like he didn't understand, still, that Trowa was gone, lost to him completely. Quatre clenched his jaw and watched, and Duo knew he could feel everything he felt, for Trowa, and Quatre stood and turned and left. 


	28. Tremble

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Reference to past 1x2x5, current 1x5

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

“Leaving?” Trowa slipped in to Duo's room silently, crossing his arms over his chest. Duo froze, his clothing scattered over his bed, duffel bag on the floor. He swallowed and nodded. Trowa clutched his sides, watching as Duo slowly packed a rolled up shirt.

“Were you going to tell anyone? Were you going to tell me?”

“Trowa,” Duo sighed, turning. He was still too pale, half a month after the showdown with Zechs, and Trowa wondered what else he had hidden. He'd hidden this pretty well, from the others. Trowa waited for Duo's words like the sacrament. “I can't stay here. Heero and Wufei...they don't need me. Not anymore. I have to go.”

Trowa gaped at him. Duo hadn't mentioned him. Not once, and Trowa looked down, hands fisting in the material of his shirt. He inhaled, slowly. Duo was leaving them—was leaving him. There was nothing to hold him. Trowa had pushed Duo back every time he'd brought up the future. Every time he'd brought up “us. ” And now he was leaving, because no one needed him anymore.

Duo stared at Trowa, mouth dropped open. He was trembling, holding himself tightly and looking at the ground. Dropping the shirt, Duo crossed to him, putting a hand on his arm. This wasn't like Trowa at all. Trowa wasn't emotional, not like this. Trowa jolted at his touch, covering his hand with his own. He swallowed.

“Looks like I'll be spending tonight packing,” Trowa's voice shook.

“What?” Duo blinked.

“I'm not—you can't leave me here,” Trowa growled a little. He held Duo's shoulders, looking down and down and down in to wide, surprised violet eyes.

“Trowa, it's okay. You and Quat—you're over, you know You can go find someone...” Duo looked away. Trowa made a strangled noise, his hands tightening on Duo's shoulders. He wanted Duo to stop, to shut up, but Duo didn't, and the quiet “You never needed me anyway,” sliced through him like a scythe. He drew back, wounded, and Duo swallowed.

“I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was leaving,” Duo whispered. Trowa turned and stepped in to the hall, shutting the door behind himself. He leaned back against it, listening to the harsh, shocked noise Duo made.

Swallowing, he pushed away. How was he supposed to correct six months of misunderstanding. Their relationship was based on a lie he'd never known existed. He thought Duo knew, but how could Duo know something Trowa'd never bothered to tell him? And now it was too late, and Trowa cursed and left, speeding out of the driveway with his demons on his heels. 


	29. Promise

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** None. BUT THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITES OKAY. 

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

Trowa paced his studio. Duo was leaving, was leaving him, was running away, and Trowa didn't know how to stop it. After the past three months, he knew he wouldn't last long without Duo by his side. It was less a want and more a need so powerful he could already feel the leech of Duo from his bones.

He packed furiously, throwing clothing in to a backpack, not bothering with toiletries. The only thing he paused over was his book. It was a copy of  _Alice in Wonderland_ and  _Through The Looking Glass_ in one, battered and ancient and the first book he'd ever learned to read. Trowa swallowed, remembering last Halloween, Duo's birthday, when they'd dressed up as the Mad Hatter and the Cheshire cat and surprised everyone. He shoved the book in his bag, threw the bag over his shoulder and left, heading back to the house as fast as he could.

Duo was pulling out when he got there, and Trowa turned his bike as fast as he could, cutting the engine. Inside the car he could see Duo, his Duo, and Trowa wasn't going to let him go anywhere without him. He slid off the bike and marched to the driver's side of the car, yanking the door open and sliding both hands in to Duo's long, beautiful hair.

“You are not leaving me,” Trowa's voice broke, a shivering running through him. He looked at Duo, in to Duo, vulnerable and open and more afraid than he'd been they day Quatre had shot him off in to space. Duo stared at him, mouth gaping in surprise, and Trowa covered that mouth with his own, cupping the back of Duo's head and cupping Duo's cheek and crying, suddenly.

“Tro?” Duo panted, eyebrows drawing together, reaching out to very gently brush away the tears on his face, and Trowa caught his fingers, kissing them and resting his forehead against them, shuddering and closing his eyes.

“Please, Duo. Please don't leave me,” Trowa's breath hitched, and he clung to Duo's fingers, crying against them and Duo pulled away. It felt like the wind being forced out of him, and Trowa's knees buckled, and he felt himself fall down in to Duo's arms, warm and around his waist, suddenly. His hands clung to Duo's shirt.

“Trowa...” Duo kept his arm tight around Trowa's waist, brushing his face clean and kissing his cheeks and nose and his chin and finally, his mouth, and Trowa let out a choked sob and kissed back, grateful for the body against his, the arms holding him up.

“Brat,” Trowa chocked, and clung, and it was enough, Duo decided, pulling back to gently wipe Trowa's face.

“Get in, love,” he murmured, sitting back and Trowa hiccuped and nodded, getting in to the car as fast as he could, reaching for Duo's hand. Duo took it, and squeezed, kissing the palm like a promise. 


	30. Future

**Notes:** Thank you to [Tina](http://tinadoodle.tumblr.com/) for bein’ a beta!  

**General Warnings** : Yaoi, angst, bits and pieces of sap slipped in. References to infidelity. 

**This Part Specific:** Smut! 

**Disclaimer** : I do not own Gundam Wing

* * *

 

They came back to Sanc after a month. Duo's skin was tan, his hair littered with highlights, and Trowa watched him as he talked, or sat, or did anything near him. Trowa was tanned, too, his hair a little more red, and they settled in to their apartment with the help of Heero and Wufei, who grinned slyly at them and winked and finally made Duo blush, sticking his tongue out and swatting at them, shooing them out

Trowa grinned broadly, and Duo threw a shoe at him, finally, laughing and then running after him down the hall, tackling him on the bed and pinning his wrists. He growled a little, eyes playfully and bright and happy and Trowa felt awed that he could put that look there, on that face. Duo leaned in, nipping his lower lip, tugging and then smoothing the flesh with his tongue.

“So you caught me,” Trowa prompted, lying back against their bed, pulse already racing, and Duo leered, hips meeting Trowa's against the bed. Trowa bit his lip, bucking, tilting his head to make room for Duo's eager mouth on his throat, the sting of teeth. He slid his fingers in to Duo's hair and tugged, gently, moaning as Duo's fingers found his nipples, teasing then twisting, mouth hot against his pulse.

“Mine,” Duo ran his tongue over Trowa's ear, panting in to it and running his hand down the front of Trowa's pants, kneading the bulge and pushing up Trowa's shirt, mouthing over his chest. He circled a nipple with his tongue and Trowa bucked, arching in to his mouth.

“Yours,” he moaned, smiling around the word and tugging the hair in his hands, pulling Duo up and kissing him, rolling his hips upwards, drawing a small, pleased noise out of his lover. Trowa panted, stroking his hand over Duo's cheek, and Duo kissed his wrist.

This was their bed, their home, and they took their time, Duo undressing Trowa with steady hands, mouth and lips and teeth teasing over each bared expanse of skin. Trowa was writhing by the time Duo slid a finger in to him, crooking it and tonguing the spot behind his ear. Duo went slow, working his way to three fingers and watching Trowa's face, lips brushing his cheeks and nose, his closed eyelids. He lubed his cock quickly, thrusting in to Trowa and stroking his thighs. They finished quickly, the long foreplay tugging them over the edge and leaving them trembling in each others arms, panting against each other's lips.

“I love you,” Trowa panted in Russian, stroking back Duo's hair and smiling. Duo smiled back, kissing his palm and covering the hand on his cheek. He leaned in, covering Trowa's mouth and breathing in, then out, kissing him and stroking their twined hands through his own hair, pushing it behind his ear.

“I love you,” Duo smiles, and Trowa understood it, now, the language that Duo'd always spoken, to him. 


End file.
